Post by: bflynn on February 09, 2023, 09:05:13 AM
If you feel like spending money:
https://www.vosgeschocolate.com/
My wife has had both and prefers https://www.kateweiserchocolate.com/ from Dallas. They're both good, but I'm not a big chocolate fan, so I'm not sure I'm a judge.
Post by: President-Elect Bob Noel on February 09, 2023, 09:15:23 AM
In case there are actual replies, this will stop the joke thread from becoming a discussion of chocolate.
....
yeah, right, that will work...
:)
Post by: Rush on February 09, 2023, 09:37:43 AM
In case there are actual replies, this will stop the joke thread from becoming a discussion of chocolate.
My wife has had both and prefers https://www.kateweiserchocolate.com/ from Dallas. They're both good, but I'm not a big chocolate fan, so I'm not sure I'm a judge.
Now you've done it. I'm going to have to order some of that.
Post by: elwood blues on February 09, 2023, 10:00:51 AM
I do not understand spending that kind of money hoping that it will get you laid. :-\
Post by: Rush on February 09, 2023, 12:00:11 PM
I understand spending that kind of money if you're a connoisseur.
I do not understand spending that kind of money hoping that it will get you laid. :-\
In my house, the get laid happens anyway. And if he doesn't buy me chocolate, I just order it for myself and pay for it out of his money. ;D
Post by: Username on February 09, 2023, 12:34:11 PM
Special occasions, dark chocolate turtles from Amazon for her or a Russel Stovers dark chocolate assortment. For me a bag of dark chocolate peanut M&Ms. Yeah, I have no kooth. But I do give her flowers every Friday since we've been married. 27 years and counting.
Post by: Anthony on February 09, 2023, 12:46:44 PM
I understand spending that kind of money if you're a connoisseur.
I do not understand spending that kind of money hoping that it will get you laid. :-\
Yeah. I'm not giving her presents to get sex, as we are way past that threshold, but I do want to keep her around a little while longer. Plus it makes me happy when she's happy. ;D
Post by: jb1842 on February 09, 2023, 12:52:36 PM
Post by: Rush on February 09, 2023, 02:43:40 PM
My wife and I don't have that fine a taste so that we can distinguish between store-bought chocolate and the ultra premium stuff. My sister in Hawaii grows chocolate and she sends us stuff from her farm. It does taste better, but maybe because its quality is more tightly controlled and there are no additives. Or maybe it's just our imagination.
Special occasions, dark chocolate turtles from Amazon for her or a Russel Stovers dark chocolate assortment. For me a bag of dark chocolate peanut M&Ms. Yeah, I have no kooth. But I do give her flowers every Friday since we've been married. 27 years and counting.
Only dark for me. I never touch milk chocolate. It’s only 10% chocolate, screw that.
37 years for us. That’s sweet about the flowers.
Post by: jb1842 on February 09, 2023, 03:02:07 PM
Post by: Anthony on February 09, 2023, 04:11:19 PM
Only dark for me. I never touch milk chocolate. It’s only 10% chocolate, screw that.
37 years for us. That’s sweet about the flowers.
37 years. I can't even imagine, nor do I really want to, at least for me. ;D
Post by: EppyGA - White Christian Domestic Terrorist on February 09, 2023, 06:04:41 PM
I love giving my wife shit over flowers. Love is supposed to last forever, and giving flowers is supposed to show someone you love them. But flowers die after a few days. So why would you want a symbol of love that will die relatively soon?www.ihatestevensinger.com (http://www.ihatstevensinger.com)
Post by: Rush on February 09, 2023, 06:12:03 PM
www.ihatstevensinger.com
Did you leave an e out?
https://www.ihatestevensinger.com/
Post by: Rush on February 09, 2023, 06:16:50 PM
37 years. I can't even imagine, nor do I really want to, at least for me. ;D
You really have to have married the right person in the first place to not be suicidal after 37 years with the same damn person every day. The trick is, how do you know, when you’re a stupid young’un, if it’s the right person? Maybe you don’t. Maybe some of us just luck out.
Post by: President-Elect Bob Noel on February 09, 2023, 06:44:28 PM
You really have to have married the right person in the first place to not be suicidal after 37 years with the same damn person every day. The trick is, how do you know, when you’re a stupid young’un, if it’s the right person? Maybe you don’t. Maybe some of us just luck out.
some put the effort in to make it work...
(easy for me to say from the cheap seats...)
Post by: Rush on February 09, 2023, 06:49:40 PM
some put the effort in to make it work...
(easy for me to say from the cheap seats...)
Yes. I found the effort was during the years raising kids. High pressure and stress.
Post by: Anthony on February 09, 2023, 07:15:31 PM
Yes. I found the effort was during the years raising kids. High pressure and stress.
Again, can't imagine that pressure. Congratulations Rush!
Post by: Becky (My pronouns are Assigned/By/God) on February 09, 2023, 09:02:07 PM
Yes. I found the effort was during the years raising kids. High pressure and stress.
Amen. Marriage is easy compared to kids. For a nerdy introvert, policing other people is hell. However, it’s essential of course to do the job right.
Post by: Becky (My pronouns are Assigned/By/God) on February 09, 2023, 09:02:49 PM
https://www.tazachocolate.com/collections/wicked-dark/products/wicked-dark
Post by: Little Joe on February 10, 2023, 04:40:07 AM
www.ihatstevensinger.com? ? ?
Oh, I see Rush already caught that.
Post by: EppyGA - White Christian Domestic Terrorist on February 10, 2023, 06:12:17 AM
Did you leave an e out?Indeed I did.
https://www.ihatestevensinger.com/ (https://www.ihatestevensinger.com/)
Post by: Rush on February 10, 2023, 06:52:46 AM
Amen. Marriage is easy compared to kids. For a nerdy introvert, policing other people is hell. However, it’s essential of course to do the job right.
Lots of pressure on both of us. What happens is the relationship is submerged. You’re too busy to spend time connecting, and not connecting is THE big threat to romantic relationships and introduces the danger of finding intimacy elsewhere, example, coworkers. It’s extremely hard to “connect” when you come home, and you face dinner, housework, with little kids yammering and tugging at you. It is literally impossible to have a decent conversation with kids around. By the time the kids are in bed you’re so wiped you don’t even want sex, you just crash, and still haven’t verbally connected.
So the work is, first you must recognize the danger exists. I’m convinced a lot of divorces happen because people get too far down the road before awareness creeps in that they’ve ignored the primary relationship too long. Second, you must act to create time for the relationship. Get a babysitter and have date night. Drop the kids at the grandparents and go for a weekend vacation. You must consider these things necessities, not luxuries, and budget for them.
Remain healthy. Try not to get fat, that’s bad for sexual attraction. Schedule sex. Forget the idea that “it’s got to be spontaneous or it’s not fun.” Women with small kids and babies do not feel very sexy but you can put work into it for the sake of the relationship. Do not underestimate the power of sex to defuse simmering anger and resentment and reboot your feelings about each other.
Nip outside attractions in the bud. Everybody made fun of Mike Pence when he said he wouldn’t go to dinner with a woman not his wife but he is exactly right. Those are the opportunities to feel a spark with someone else that can grow to threaten your marriage.
Manage your finances. Do not go into debt. Do not live beyond your means. Money problems are a huge strain on a relationship. Unfortunately if it leads to divorce, things can get even worse in that department, especially for the man.
Learn how to argue. Avoid “you always” attacks, and so on. All of this requires conscious effort, and the marriage can survive the underwater years. Then when the kids grow up and move away, if you’ve held it together this long, worked hard and built a life, you have an ironclad long term bond.
Of course, all of this only works if you marry the right person in the first place. It has to be someone you like, not are just infatuated with, but like, as in friend, companion. Not a narcissistic psychopath or anything.
Post by: Rush on February 10, 2023, 06:53:53 AM
Indeed I did.
Haha, “I hat Steven…” didn’t make any sense so I figured hat was hate and that made sense.
Post by: Jim Logajan on February 10, 2023, 09:30:26 AM
Lots of pressure on both of us. What happens is the relationship is submerged. You’re too busy to spend time connecting, and not connecting is THE big threat to romantic relationships and introduces the danger of finding intimacy elsewhere, example, coworkers. It’s extremely hard to “connect” when you come home, and you face dinner, housework, with little kids yammering and tugging at you. It is literally impossible to have a decent conversation with kids around. By the time the kids are in bed you’re so wiped you don’t even want sex, you just crash, and still haven’t verbally connected.
So the work is, first you must recognize the danger exists. I’m convinced a lot of divorces happen because people get too far down the road before awareness creeps in that they’ve ignored the primary relationship too long. Second, you must act to create time for the relationship. Get a babysitter and have date night. Drop the kids at the grandparents and go for a weekend vacation. You must consider these things necessities, not luxuries, and budget for them.
Remain healthy. Try not to get fat, that’s bad for sexual attraction. Schedule sex. Forget the idea that “it’s got to be spontaneous or it’s not fun.” Women with small kids and babies do not feel very sexy but you can put work into it for the sake of the relationship. Do not underestimate the power of sex to defuse simmering anger and resentment and reboot your feelings about each other.
Nip outside attractions in the bud. Everybody made fun of Mike Pence when he said he wouldn’t go to dinner with a woman not his wife but he is exactly right. Those are the opportunities to feel a spark with someone else that can grow to threaten your marriage.
Manage your finances. Do not go into debt. Do not live beyond your means. Money problems are a huge strain on a relationship. Unfortunately if it leads to divorce, things can get even worse in that department, especially for the man.
Learn how to argue. Avoid “you always” attacks, and so on. All of this requires conscious effort, and the marriage can survive the underwater years. Then when the kids grow up and move away, if you’ve held it together this long, worked hard and built a life, you have an ironclad long term bond.
Of course, all of this only works if you marry the right person in the first place. It has to be someone you like, not are just infatuated with, but like, as in friend, companion. Not a narcissistic psychopath or anything.
Never give good advice away for free. Nobody will pay attention. Instead, start a TV show, maybe titled "Rush on Relationships" or write a best selling book!
Post by: nddons on February 10, 2023, 02:32:35 PM
You really have to have married the right person in the first place to not be suicidal after 37 years with the same damn person every day. The trick is, how do you know, when you’re a stupid young’un, if it’s the right person? Maybe you don’t. Maybe some of us just luck out.39 for me. Hope she lets me live until the 40th in November.
Post by: Becky (My pronouns are Assigned/By/God) on February 10, 2023, 03:12:56 PM
Of course, all of this only works if you marry the right person in the first place. It has to be someone you like, not are just infatuated with, but like, as in friend, companion. Not a narcissistic psychopath or anything.
This is the crux of the matter and foundational. It doesn’t get enough press. But it’s surprisingly easier to do than most people realize.
After a disastrous first marriage, I looked very hard at what the factors were that led to its failure so I could avoid repeating such a mistake. Next time, I considered:
What are his relationships with his family like, especially his mother?
How does he treat people? Is he kind?
How does he view money … as security, for enjoying life, or both?
His does he react when disagreed with?
Is he moody or given to pouting and quick anger?
What are his views on the spiritual dimension of life?
Is he secure in himself or does he look for validation through pleasing others?
Can we talk honestly and openly about everything?
Do our basic values align?
There are so many more. Books have been written about choosing a mate. Sadly, many people ignore these steps.
I’m grateful that I waited post-divorce through the 12 guys I dated before meeting my husband. I’d actually made a list of 14 qualities I knew I had to have … their absence would be deal-breaking. Funnily, the 12 guys I dated rarely met even five or six of them.
My husband met them all. At the time we met he’d expressed no interest in flying, but “must not fly planes” wasn’t on my list!
Post by: Rush on February 10, 2023, 03:50:36 PM
This is the crux of the matter and foundational. It doesn’t get enough press. But it’s surprisingly easier to do than most people realize.
After a disastrous first marriage, I looked very hard at what the factors were that led to its failure so I could avoid repeating such a mistake. Next time, I considered:
What are his relationships with his family like, especially his mother?
How does he treat people? Is he kind?
How does he view money … as security, for enjoying life, or both?
His does he react when disagreed with?
Is he moody or given to pouting and quick anger?
What are his views on the spiritual dimension of life?
Is he secure in himself or does he look for validation through pleasing others?
Can we talk honestly and openly about everything?
Do our basic values align?
There are so many more. Books have been written about choosing a mate. Sadly, many people ignore these steps.
I’m grateful that I waited post-divorce through the 12 guys I dated before meeting my husband. I’d actually made a list of 14 qualities I knew I had to have … their absence would be deal-breaking. Funnily, the 12 guys I dated rarely met even five or six of them.
My husband met them all. At the time we met he’d expressed no interest in flying, but “must not fly planes” wasn’t on my list!
Excellent list. This was my first marriage but my husband’s second. That one lasted only 4 years. He was too young and naive to know what he really wanted and they were not compatible. When we met a few years later he’d had time to mature and figure out what he needed in a mate and I suppose I fit the bill.
On my part, I had decided early on, like when I was a kid, that I wanted a man 2 years older than me, 2 inches taller than me, and an engineer. Then I came up with a list similar to yours: calm, stable personality, good work ethic, from a nuclear family with values similar to mine, etc. Your “is he secure in himself” is a good one. Confidence and self possession, secure in his skills and abilities, ambitious but realistic.
But when we met it was the shared interest in flying airplanes and “The Rocky Horror Picture Show” of all things that sparked our interest in each other. He was that mix of rock solid conservative values plus a bit of radical spice (a movie about transsexuals?) that spoke to the right leaning libertarian in me. Our politics were closely aligned, our goals were aligned, both wanted marriage and children. I wanted 3 and he wanted 2 but that was close enough to negotiate. He was 2 years 4 months older and 2 1/2 inches taller. I know that part sounds petty, but what can I say? He ticked ALL the boxes, even the superficial ones.
So I asked him what was it about me that made him know I was “the one”. He said, “When you walked up the hill in front of me I noticed you had a nice ass.”
Post by: jb1842 on February 10, 2023, 05:17:38 PM
Post by: Jim Logajan on February 10, 2023, 06:04:04 PM
At the time we met he’d expressed no interest in flying, but “must not fly planes” wasn’t on my list!
None us are perfect. ;)
While dating the subject of my flying did come up and my wife was Ok with it (I did not have a pilot license at the time.) Not her thing, but was willing to (and has) flown with me. She's always been slightly prone to motion sickness so traveling in small planes is always a risk.
Post by: Lucifer on February 10, 2023, 06:53:07 PM
Post by: Little Joe on February 11, 2023, 05:10:25 AM
This is the crux of the matter and foundational. It doesn’t get enough press. But it’s surprisingly easier to do than most people realize.
After a disastrous first marriage, I looked very hard at what the factors were that led to its failure so I could avoid repeating such a mistake. Next time, I considered:
What are his relationships with his family like, especially his mother?
How does he treat people? Is he kind?
How does he view money … as security, for enjoying life, or both?
His does he react when disagreed with?
Is he moody or given to pouting and quick anger?
What are his views on the spiritual dimension of life?
Is he secure in himself or does he look for validation through pleasing others?
Can we talk honestly and openly about everything?
Do our basic values align?
There are so many more. Books have been written about choosing a mate. Sadly, many people ignore these steps.
I’m grateful that I waited post-divorce through the 12 guys I dated before meeting my husband. I’d actually made a list of 14 qualities I knew I had to have … their absence would be deal-breaking. Funnily, the 12 guys I dated rarely met even five or six of them.
My husband met them all. At the time we met he’d expressed no interest in flying, but “must not fly planes” wasn’t on my list!
Man's list for finding a mate:
Is she good in bed?
Post by: Becky (My pronouns are Assigned/By/God) on February 11, 2023, 08:10:59 AM
Man's list for finding a mate:
Is she good in bed?
Women know this. It’s why we have our list. Women are the ones who have the most to lose from premarital sex.
And my principles required no sex before marriage. I told an engineer at work, when he asked why I was not married, that my principles removed about 98% of the eligible field. He said not to budge. “You will attract a principled man,” he said. And I did.
Post by: Anthony on February 12, 2023, 11:04:32 AM
My previous 10 wives were batshit crazy. But I sure I’ll find the right one next.
Why are you pretending to be me?
Post by: Lucifer on February 12, 2023, 11:13:16 AM
Why are you pretending to be me?
What number are you at right now?
Post by: Anthony on February 13, 2023, 03:17:41 AM
What number are you at right now?
Three and holding. ::)
Post by: Steingar on February 13, 2023, 06:24:19 AM
Three and holding. ::)
Please tell me you're not going marry the latest until after her bat-mitzvah.
Post by: Little Joe on February 13, 2023, 06:44:34 AM
https://www.cnn.com/2023/02/13/business/mars-wrigley-chocolate-vat-fine/index.html
Post by: Anthony on February 13, 2023, 08:04:36 AM
Please tell me you're not going marry the latest until after her bat-mitzvah.
She's not Jewish.
Post by: Rush on February 13, 2023, 10:21:19 AM
I thought this was appropriate for the Chocolate thread:
https://www.cnn.com/2023/02/13/business/mars-wrigley-chocolate-vat-fine/index.html
Sounds like it wasn’t hot and they weren’t injured. I hope they threw that batch out though.
Post by: nddons on February 13, 2023, 09:40:20 PM
My previous 10 wives were batshit crazy. But I sure I’ll find the right one next.Let me guess - all red heads?
Post by: Lucifer on February 13, 2023, 09:50:51 PM
Let me guess - all red heads?
Wait........how'd you know?
Post by: nddons on February 14, 2023, 06:33:22 AM
Wait........how'd you know?I dated two of them and learned. I’m a quick study. Lol
Post by: Anthony on February 14, 2023, 08:26:51 AM