PILOT SPIN
Spin Zone => Spin Zone => Topic started by: Rush on November 22, 2021, 04:33:31 AM
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KENOSHA, WI—In a stunning reversal, Kyle Rittenhouse awoke this morning to discover that he had been found guilty after all.
Prosecutors explained that during the night, they had found dozens of mail-in jury votes declaring the defendant guilty on all counts. Apparently, boxes of these mail-in votes arrived in a truck at the courthouse around 3:00 am.
Attorneys for Mr. Rittenhouse were dumbfounded as to how such a thing could have happened, raising questions as to the validity of mail-in jury voting. They stated: “We’ve never heard of this. This isn’t part of the legal system. Where did these votes even come from?”
"How DARE you question the sanctity of our criminal justice system!" cried the prosecuting attorneys. "There is no justice until EVERY vote is counted!"
Prosecutors then explained that it was a new COVID measure they had just instituted. “But given how well it’s worked out,” they said, “we’re planning on making it permanent.”
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KENOSHA, WI—In a stunning reversal, Kyle Rittenhouse awoke this morning to discover that he had been found guilty after all.
Prosecutors explained that during the night, they had found dozens of mail-in jury votes declaring the defendant guilty on all counts. Apparently, boxes of these mail-in votes arrived in a truck at the courthouse around 3:00 am.
Attorneys for Mr. Rittenhouse were dumbfounded as to how such a thing could have happened, raising questions as to the validity of mail-in jury voting. They stated: “We’ve never heard of this. This isn’t part of the legal system. Where did these votes even come from?”
"How DARE you question the sanctity of our criminal justice system!" cried the prosecuting attorneys. "There is no justice until EVERY vote is counted!"
Prosecutors then explained that it was a new COVID measure they had just instituted. “But given how well it’s worked out,” they said, “we’re planning on making it permanent.”
I LOVE the Babylon Bee!
It's too bad that their satire has become prophetic as the communist democrats (stupid people) use it for a roadmap.
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That will probably be a recurring nightmare for him for many years.
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That will probably be a recurring nightmare for him for many years.
In all seriousness, this young man would be well advised to move to a free state and go into anonymity. He has a huge target on him and the leftist would love nothing better than to see him prosecuted, even for the smallest misdemeanor.
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In all seriousness, this young man would be well advised to move to a free state and go into anonymity. He has a huge target on him and the leftist would love nothing better than to see him prosecuted, even for the smallest misdemeanor.
Yep. Change his name and appearance. And sue the hell out of MSM for defamation so he can live anywhere.
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Yep. Change his name and appearance. And sue the hell out of MSM for defamation so he can live anywhere.
Yep. He and Sandman can buy a professional sports franchise with their newfound wealth.
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In all seriousness, this young man would be well advised to move to a free state and go into anonymity. He has a huge target on him and the leftist would love nothing better than to see him prosecuted, even for the smallest misdemeanor.
A conservative county in FL or TX might be best. Even better, after he gets his 500 million, get the hell out of the US and live very well.
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A conservative county in FL or TX might be best. Even better, after he gets his 500 million, get the hell out of the US and live very well.
I just came back from the Northwoods in Wisconsin. I’ve been in the hills of Kentucky, Appalachia, and various parts Colorado. I’ve been to Mississippi, Alabama, and pretty much the whole lower 48 of this country.
If you want to get lost, you can do that right here in the USA.
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Yep. He and Sandman can buy a professional sports franchise with their newfound wealth.
NFL or NBA?
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NFL or NBA?
They’ll still want to remain obscure, so probably NHL.
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NFL or NBA?
Best if he does not buy one in Europe.
Their politically correct culture is even worse than ours.
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If they do NHL they can't be called slaveowners.
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NASCAR