A lonely woman, aged 70, decided that it was time to get married. She put an ad in the local paper that read:

"HUSBAND WANTED!

MUST BE IN MY AGE GROUP (70's),
MUST NOT BEAT ME,
MUST NOT RUN AROUND ON ME AND
MUST STILL BE GOOD IN BED!

ALL APPLICANTS PLEASE APPLY IN PERSON."

On the second day she heard the doorbell. Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a gray-haired gentleman sitting in a wheel chair. He had no arms or legs.

The old woman said, "You're not really asking me to consider you, are you?

Just look at you . . . you have no legs!"

The old man smiled, "Therefore I cannot run around on you!"

She snorted. "You don't have any hands either!"

Again the old man smiled, "Nor can I beat you!"

She raised an eyebrow and gazed intently. "Are you still good in bed?"

With that, the old gentleman leaned back, beamed a big broad smile and said, "I rang the doorbell didn't I?"

A United States Marine was taking some college courses between assignments. He had completed 20 missions in Iraq and Afghanistan . One of the courses had a professor who was an avowed atheist, and a member of the ACLU.


One day the professor shocked the class when he came in. He looked to the ceiling and flatly stated, GOD if you are real then I want you to knock me off this platform. I'll give you exactly 15 min..'


The lecture room fell silent. You could hear a pin drop.. Ten minutes went by and the professor proclaimed, 'Here I am GOD, I'm still waiting.'


It got down to the last couple of minutes when the Marine got out of his chair, went up to the professor, and cold-cocked him; knocking him off the platform. The professor was out cold.


The Marine went back to his seat and sat there, silently.

The other students were shocked and stunned, and sat there looking on in silence. The professor eventually came to, noticeably shaken, looked at the Marine and asked, 'What in the world is the matter with you? 'Why did you do that?'


The Marine calmly replied, 'GOD was too busy today protecting America's soldiers who are protecting your right to say stupid stuff and act like an idiot. So He sent me.'

Here's how it works in a nutshell:

Find a problem, hopefully one that is inconclusive.  Begin promoting what the "dangers" of this new problem are, get some bogus "experts" to attest to the coming doom and gloom.  Have your MSM buy in hook, line and sinker.

Propose new taxes to "combat the problem".  Use this revenue to fund pet projects and "spread the wealth around" by giving massive grants and loans to a new industry "working for a solution". Of course, these new industries make sure those campaign contributions pour in back to their new found friends.

 How many times have we seen this?

Because this fellow was living in the US and paying US taxes. Personally, I think the reason none of you are concerned is because he didn't have a western name or lily white skin.

Right on cue.

If someone is murdered here in the US there are laws and a process to punish the guilty.  We went to war with James Foley's killers.

 That "war" was already in progress, we did not go to war based upon this event.  Your messiah was in such a hurry to hit the golf course he basically just fluffed it off.

  I was outraged when the Obominator ordered his killbots to slay Americans with no due process, personally I think he and his henchmen should be charged with murder.  And what's going on in Yemen is far, far worse. 

 Your faux outrage is way after the fact and only brought up because you have been called out on it.

And what make it worse is that Trump's bromance with MBS has caused us to aid and abet him in his Yemini genocide. Obama's hands aren't clean in this, we aided and abetted the Saudis in their war against the poorest country in the Arabian peninsula.  We all have blood on our hands.

 Glad you are so concerned about those Yemeni people.

 Too bad you could give a shit less about the murders happening in Chicago daily, or you could even care about all the American citizens that are homeless.  And of course you don't care about the millions of American citizens that are murdered in the womb so you can say you support "choice".

 We have plenty here, right here within our borders of the USA to be concerned with. 

Of course the Donald's bromance with MBS is really weird.  Dude orchestrated the murder of an American and not a peep.  Can't say I know what's up with that.

 Khashoggi was not a US citizen.  He was not an American.  Please get your facts straight.

 Furthermore, Khashoggi had dubious ties to the Muslim Brotherhood as well as Al Qaeda.

 This act took place in a foreign country (Turkey) in a foreign embassy (KSA).  The US is not the world's police force, so under what conditions or rights does any law enforcement arm of the US have in investigating this crime?

 Odd that all of the sudden you worry about a foreigner that pisses off a foreign government getting whacked, but when BHO was targeting actual American Citizens to murder them, without due process, you were perfectly OK with it.

Yeah, the guy is supposed to fly coach.  Whatever.

 Wouldn't flying on a 200 seat passenger airliner contribute a smaller carbon foot print than one person being flown on a G5?