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Spin Zone / Re: Joke Thread: Post 'em if ya got 'em
« on: June 11, 2023, 05:15:53 AM »
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Spin Zone / Re: NY declares disaster emergency
« on: June 05, 2023, 03:26:03 PM »
We need some tar, feathers, and rails.
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Spin Zone / Re: Joke Thread: Post 'em if ya got 'em
« on: May 14, 2023, 06:59:32 AM »
A Mom is driving her little girl to her friend's house for a play date.
"Mommy," the little girl asks, "How old are you?"
"Honey, you are not supposed to ask a lady her age," the mother warns.
"It is not polite."
"OK," the little girl says, "How much do you weigh?"
"Now really," the mother says, "These are personal questions and are really none of your business."
Undaunted, the little girl asks, "Why did you and daddy get a divorce?"
"Those are enough questions, honestly!"
The exasperated mother walks away as the two friends begin to play.
"My Mom wouldn't tell me anything," the little girl says to her friend.
"Well," said the friend, "All you need to do is look at her driver's license.
It's like a report card; it has everything on it."
Later that night the little girl says to her mother, "I know how old you are, you are 32."
The mother is surprised and asks, "How did you find that out?"
"I also know that you weigh 140 pounds."
The mother is past surprised and shocked now.
"How in heaven's name did you find that out?"
"And," the little girl says triumphantly, "I know why you and daddy got a divorce."
"Oh really?" the mother asks.
"Why?"
"Because you got an F in sex.“
"Mommy," the little girl asks, "How old are you?"
"Honey, you are not supposed to ask a lady her age," the mother warns.
"It is not polite."
"OK," the little girl says, "How much do you weigh?"
"Now really," the mother says, "These are personal questions and are really none of your business."
Undaunted, the little girl asks, "Why did you and daddy get a divorce?"
"Those are enough questions, honestly!"
The exasperated mother walks away as the two friends begin to play.
"My Mom wouldn't tell me anything," the little girl says to her friend.
"Well," said the friend, "All you need to do is look at her driver's license.
It's like a report card; it has everything on it."
Later that night the little girl says to her mother, "I know how old you are, you are 32."
The mother is surprised and asks, "How did you find that out?"
"I also know that you weigh 140 pounds."
The mother is past surprised and shocked now.
"How in heaven's name did you find that out?"
"And," the little girl says triumphantly, "I know why you and daddy got a divorce."
"Oh really?" the mother asks.
"Why?"
"Because you got an F in sex.“
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Spin Zone / Re: Joke Thread: Post 'em if ya got 'em
« on: April 06, 2023, 05:03:12 PM »
Paddy had been drinking at his local pub all day and most of the night, celebrating St Patrick's Day.
Mick, the bartender says, 'You'll not be drinking anymore tonight, Paddy'.
Paddy replies, 'OK Mick, I'll be on my way then'. Paddy spins around on his stool and steps off. He falls flat on his face.'Damn' he says and pulls himself up by the stool and dusts himself off.
He takes a step towards the door and falls flat on his face, 'oh bloody damn!' He looks to the doorway and thinks to himself that if he can just get to the door and some fresh air he'll be fine.He belly crawls to the door and shimmies up to the door frame.
He sticks his head outside and takes a deep breath of fresh air, feels much better and takes a step out onto the sidewalk and falls flat on his face.'Bi' Jesus… I'm in bloody trouble,' he says.
He can see his house just a few doors down, and crawls to the door, hauls himself up the door frame, opens the door and shimmies inside.
He takes a look up the stairs and says 'No bloody way....'He crawls up the stairs to his bedroom door and says 'I can make it to the bed'.
He takes a step into the room and falls flat on his face. He says 'damn it' and falls into bed.
The next morning, his wife, Jess, comes into the room carrying a cup of coffee and says, 'Get up Paddy. Did you have a bit to drink last night ? 'Paddy says, 'I did, Jess. I was bloody pissed. But how did you know?''
Mick phoned .. . . You left your wheelchair at the pub.'
Mick, the bartender says, 'You'll not be drinking anymore tonight, Paddy'.
Paddy replies, 'OK Mick, I'll be on my way then'. Paddy spins around on his stool and steps off. He falls flat on his face.'Damn' he says and pulls himself up by the stool and dusts himself off.
He takes a step towards the door and falls flat on his face, 'oh bloody damn!' He looks to the doorway and thinks to himself that if he can just get to the door and some fresh air he'll be fine.He belly crawls to the door and shimmies up to the door frame.
He sticks his head outside and takes a deep breath of fresh air, feels much better and takes a step out onto the sidewalk and falls flat on his face.'Bi' Jesus… I'm in bloody trouble,' he says.
He can see his house just a few doors down, and crawls to the door, hauls himself up the door frame, opens the door and shimmies inside.
He takes a look up the stairs and says 'No bloody way....'He crawls up the stairs to his bedroom door and says 'I can make it to the bed'.
He takes a step into the room and falls flat on his face. He says 'damn it' and falls into bed.
The next morning, his wife, Jess, comes into the room carrying a cup of coffee and says, 'Get up Paddy. Did you have a bit to drink last night ? 'Paddy says, 'I did, Jess. I was bloody pissed. But how did you know?''
Mick phoned .. . . You left your wheelchair at the pub.'
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Spin Zone / Re: Biden’s BIZARRE messaging
« on: April 03, 2023, 04:55:30 PM »Thanks Joe. Don't know her.
The media says she is nuts. Translation: She is over the target and dropping truth bombs.
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Spin Zone / Re: Joke Thread: Post 'em if ya got 'em
« on: March 03, 2023, 02:09:20 PM »
Indian American v American Indian v Native American
I am part of the 3rd group.
I am part of the 3rd group.
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Spin Zone / Re: Covidiocy Continued
« on: February 28, 2023, 01:33:36 PM »
From Hanoi Jane:
Jane Fonda Calls Covid 'God's Gift to the Left'
I am not putting her video up, I hate that b****.
Jane Fonda Calls Covid 'God's Gift to the Left'
I am not putting her video up, I hate that b****.
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Spin Zone / Re: Joke Thread: Post 'em if ya got 'em
« on: February 21, 2023, 12:34:04 PM »Love it. I’m an engineer, my husband’s an engineer, and both our daughters married engineers. I’m forwarding this to all of them.
And no, I do not particularly like hugs.
My son starts Texas A&M in August. He was accepted to the engineering department. He is thinking Aerospace Engineering. He is a pilot and working on his instrument rating at 17.
He hates being hugged. I hug him at times just to make him uncomfortable.
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Spin Zone / Re: Chinese Spy Ballon Floating Acrosd America
« on: February 21, 2023, 06:47:07 AM »
