31
Spin Zone / Re: Joke Thread: Post 'em if ya got 'em
« on: January 30, 2023, 01:06:11 PM »
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32
Spin Zone / Re: Covidiocy Continued
« on: January 25, 2023, 08:07:35 AM »I hereby declare Rush selfless and intrepid. But I’m no longer fantasizing about moving to Texas!
Texas can kill you about 100 different ways, just in your yard.
The number goes up as you travel down the road.
Good job on being prepared, Rush!
33
Spin Zone / Re: Joke Thread: Post 'em if ya got 'em
« on: January 05, 2023, 07:25:19 AM »
A young man pulls up to a burger joint drive up window...
The lady at the window asks, "how may I help you sir?" to which he replies, " I wanna give you a heads up that there is a woman in your parking lot offering her services for a junior burger with cheese and a small order of fries".
She says, "thank you sir, I will let my manager know. Now may I take your order?"
"Yes", he says, "I'll have a junior burger with cheese and a small order of fries".
The lady at the window asks, "how may I help you sir?" to which he replies, " I wanna give you a heads up that there is a woman in your parking lot offering her services for a junior burger with cheese and a small order of fries".
She says, "thank you sir, I will let my manager know. Now may I take your order?"
"Yes", he says, "I'll have a junior burger with cheese and a small order of fries".
34
Spin Zone / Re: White House Releases "Talking Points" for Thanksgiving Dinner
« on: November 23, 2022, 04:34:40 PM »
I have cousin who is about 18 years younger than me.
We were at my moms house and we were talking life.
I said something that a conservative would way, like the .fedgov is not very efficient or something of that tone.
She looked at me and said that we would not see eye to eye on many political views and I said ok. We do not have to talk politics (I rarely do with her part of the family). I said we love you, you are part of the family and we can talk about other things of interest. She looked and me with had a reserved look, but then calmed down and we have a great conversation.
She ended up marrying a dude (total libtard) who did not want kids due to killing the planet. She wanted kids very badly. She said that she is sad that the person she loves does not want what she wants.
About 3 months after my wife started dating again, I started the conversation about kids. She said that she never considered having kids until she was around my family. She hates her family and thought she did not want kids. She saw how my family acted to each other and realized having a loving family is possible.
People who follow these talking points are libtard, mind-numb robots.
We were at my moms house and we were talking life.
I said something that a conservative would way, like the .fedgov is not very efficient or something of that tone.
She looked at me and said that we would not see eye to eye on many political views and I said ok. We do not have to talk politics (I rarely do with her part of the family). I said we love you, you are part of the family and we can talk about other things of interest. She looked and me with had a reserved look, but then calmed down and we have a great conversation.
She ended up marrying a dude (total libtard) who did not want kids due to killing the planet. She wanted kids very badly. She said that she is sad that the person she loves does not want what she wants.
About 3 months after my wife started dating again, I started the conversation about kids. She said that she never considered having kids until she was around my family. She hates her family and thought she did not want kids. She saw how my family acted to each other and realized having a loving family is possible.
People who follow these talking points are libtard, mind-numb robots.
36
Spin Zone / Re: Mid Term Election Predictions Page
« on: November 02, 2022, 04:42:14 PM »They’ll pick up four but then two of them will recount for days and “find” just enough ballots to reverse and it will end up being only two and the left will riot in the streets over the Nazi coup. That’s my official prediction.
I am not going to 'Like' this as it is true, and I do not like it.
37
Spin Zone / What do you think of your state?
« on: October 31, 2022, 02:42:08 PM »
This is stolen from another forum, but I agree with all of it.
God Bless TEXAS! This is a must read for all Texans, used-to-be Texans, adopted Texans or wanna-be Texans:
Just Texas
Pep, Texas 79353
Smiley, Texas 78159
Paradise, Texas 76073
Rainbow, Texas 76077
Sweet Home, Texas 77987
Comfort, Texas 78013
Friendship, Texas 76530
Love the sun?
Sun City, Texas 78628
Sunrise, Texas 76661
Sunset, Texas 76270
Sundown, Texas 79372
Sunray, Texas 79086
Sunny Side, Texas 77423
Want something to eat?
Bacon, Texas 76301
Noodle, Texas 79536
Oatmeal, Texas 78605
Turkey, Texas 79261
Trout, Texas 75789
Sugar Land, Texas 77479
Salty, Texas 76567
Rice, Texas 75155
Pearland, Texas 77581
Orange, Texas 77630
And top it off with:
Sweetwater, Texas 79556
Why travel to other cities? Texas has them all!
Detroit, Texas 75436
Cleveland, Texas 75436
Colorado City, Texas 79512
Denver City, Texas 79323
Klondike, Texas 75448
Pittsburg, Texas 75686
Newark, Texas 76071
Nevada, Texas 75173
Memphis, Texas 79245
Miami, Texas 79059
Omaha, Texas 75579
Boston, Texas 75570
Santa Fe, Texas 77517
Tennessee Colony, Texas 75861
Reno, Texas 75462
Pasadena, Texas 77506
Columbus, Texas 78934
Feel like traveling outside the country?
Athens, Texas 75751
Canadian, Texas 79014
China, Texas 77613
Dublin, Texas 76446
Egypt, Texas 77436
Ireland, Texas 76538
Italy, Texas 76538
Turkey, Texas 79261
London, Texas 76854
New London, Texas 75682
Paris, Texas 75460
Palestine, Texas 75801
No need to travel to Washington DC
Whitehouse, Texas 75791
We even have a city named after our planet!
Earth, Texas 79031
We have a city named after our state:
Texas City, Texas 77590
Exhausted?
Energy, Texas 76452
Cold?
Blanket, Texas 76432
Winters, Texas 79567
Like to read about History?
Santa Anna, Texas 76878
Goliad, Texas 77963
Alamo, Texas 78516
Gun Barrel City, Texas 75156
Robert Lee, Texas 76945
Need Office Supplies?
Staples, Texas 78670
Want to go into outer space?
Venus, Texas 76084
Mars, Texas 79062
You guessed it. It's on the state line.
Texline, Texas 79087
For the kids...
Kermit, Texas 79745
Elmo, Texas 75118
Nemo, Texas 76070
Tarzan, Texas 79783
Winnie, Texas 77665
Sylvester, Texas 79560
Other city names in Texas, to make you smile......
Frognot, Texas 75424
Bigfoot, Texas 78005
Hogeye, Texas 75423
Cactus, Texas 79013
Notrees, Texas 79759
Best, Texas 76932
Veribest, Texas 76886
Kickapoo, Texas 75763
Dime Box, Texas 77853
Old Dime Box, Texas 77853
Telephone, Texas 75488
Telegraph, Texas 76883
Whiteface, Texas 79379
Twitty, Texas 79079
The Anti-Al Gore City
Kilgore, Texas 75662
And our favorites...
Cut and Shoot, Texas 77303
Gun Barrel City, Texas 75147
Ding Dong, Texas
West, Texas (it's in Central Texas)
and, of course,
Muleshoe, Texas 79347
Here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about folks from Texas
If someone in a Lowe's store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you may live in Texas;
If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you may live in Texas;
If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you may live in Texas;
If 'Vacation' means going anywhere south of Dallas for the weekend, you may live in Texas;
If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Texas;
If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Texas;
If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you may live in Texas;
If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Texas;
If the speed limit on the highway is 55 mph --you're going 80 and everybody's passing you, you may live in Texas;
If you find 60 degrees 'a little chilly,' you may live in Texas;
If you actually understand these jokes, and share them with all your Texas friends, you definitely live in Texas.
Here are some little known, very interesting facts about Texas:
1. Beaumont to El Paso: 742miles
2. Beaumont to Chicago : 770 miles
3. El Paso is closer to California than to Dallas
4. World's first rodeo was in Pecos, July 4, 1883.
5. The Flagship Hotel in Galveston is the only hotel in North America built over water. Destroyed by Hurricane Ike - 2008!
6. The Heisman Trophy was named after John William Heisman who was the first full-time coach at Rice University in Houston.
7. Brazoria County has more species of birds than any other area in North America.
8. Aransas Wildlife Refuge is the winter home of North America 's only remaining flock of whooping cranes.
9. Jalapeno jelly originated in Lake Jackson in 1978.
10. The worst natural disaster in US history was in 1900, caused by a hurricane in which over 8,000 lives were lost on Galveston Island.
11. The first word spoken from the moon, July 20, 1969, was "Houston," but the Space Center was actually in Clear Lake City at the time.
12. King Ranch in South Texas is larger than Rhode Island.
13. Tropical Storm Claudette brought a US rainfall record of 43" in 24 hours in and around Alvin in July of 1979.
14. Texas is the only state to enter the US by TREATY, (known as the Constitution of 1845 by the Republic of Texas to enter the Union) instead of by annexation. This allows the Texas Flag to fly at the same height as the US Flag, and Texas may choose to divide into 5 states.
15. A Live Oak tree near Fulton is estimated to be 1500 years old.
16. Caddo Lake is the only natural lake in the state.
17. Dr Pepper was invented in Waco in 1885. There is no period in Dr Pepper.
18. Texas has had six capital cities: Washington-on-the Brazos, Harrisburg, Galveston, Velasco, West Columbia, and Austin.
19. The Capitol Dome in Austin is the only dome in the US which is taller than the Capitol Building in Washington, DC (by 7 feet).
20. The San Jacinto Monument is the tallest free standing monument in the world and it is taller than the Washington Monument
21. The name 'Texas ' comes from the Hasini Indian word 'tejas' meaning friends. Tejas is not Spanish for Texas.
22. The State Mascot is the Armadillo. An interesting bit of trivia about the armadillo is they always have four babies. They have one egg, which splits into four, and they either have four males or four females.
23. The first domed stadium in the US was the Astrodome in Houston.
Cowboy's Ten Commandments posted on the wall at Cross Trails Church in Farlie, Texas:
(1) Just one God.
(2) Honor yer Ma & Pa.
(3) No telling tales or gossipin'.
(4) Git yourself to Sunday meeting.
(5) Put nothin' before God.
(6) No foolin' around with another fellow's gal.
(7) No killin'.
(
Watch yer mouth.
(9) Don't take what ain't yers.
(10) Don't be hankerin' for yer buddy's stuff.
Y'all git all that?
Lord, keep Your arm around my shoulder
and Your hand over my mouth.
God Bless TEXAS! This is a must read for all Texans, used-to-be Texans, adopted Texans or wanna-be Texans:
Just Texas
Pep, Texas 79353
Smiley, Texas 78159
Paradise, Texas 76073
Rainbow, Texas 76077
Sweet Home, Texas 77987
Comfort, Texas 78013
Friendship, Texas 76530
Love the sun?
Sun City, Texas 78628
Sunrise, Texas 76661
Sunset, Texas 76270
Sundown, Texas 79372
Sunray, Texas 79086
Sunny Side, Texas 77423
Want something to eat?
Bacon, Texas 76301
Noodle, Texas 79536
Oatmeal, Texas 78605
Turkey, Texas 79261
Trout, Texas 75789
Sugar Land, Texas 77479
Salty, Texas 76567
Rice, Texas 75155
Pearland, Texas 77581
Orange, Texas 77630
And top it off with:
Sweetwater, Texas 79556
Why travel to other cities? Texas has them all!
Detroit, Texas 75436
Cleveland, Texas 75436
Colorado City, Texas 79512
Denver City, Texas 79323
Klondike, Texas 75448
Pittsburg, Texas 75686
Newark, Texas 76071
Nevada, Texas 75173
Memphis, Texas 79245
Miami, Texas 79059
Omaha, Texas 75579
Boston, Texas 75570
Santa Fe, Texas 77517
Tennessee Colony, Texas 75861
Reno, Texas 75462
Pasadena, Texas 77506
Columbus, Texas 78934
Feel like traveling outside the country?
Athens, Texas 75751
Canadian, Texas 79014
China, Texas 77613
Dublin, Texas 76446
Egypt, Texas 77436
Ireland, Texas 76538
Italy, Texas 76538
Turkey, Texas 79261
London, Texas 76854
New London, Texas 75682
Paris, Texas 75460
Palestine, Texas 75801
No need to travel to Washington DC
Whitehouse, Texas 75791
We even have a city named after our planet!
Earth, Texas 79031
We have a city named after our state:
Texas City, Texas 77590
Exhausted?
Energy, Texas 76452
Cold?
Blanket, Texas 76432
Winters, Texas 79567
Like to read about History?
Santa Anna, Texas 76878
Goliad, Texas 77963
Alamo, Texas 78516
Gun Barrel City, Texas 75156
Robert Lee, Texas 76945
Need Office Supplies?
Staples, Texas 78670
Want to go into outer space?
Venus, Texas 76084
Mars, Texas 79062
You guessed it. It's on the state line.
Texline, Texas 79087
For the kids...
Kermit, Texas 79745
Elmo, Texas 75118
Nemo, Texas 76070
Tarzan, Texas 79783
Winnie, Texas 77665
Sylvester, Texas 79560
Other city names in Texas, to make you smile......
Frognot, Texas 75424
Bigfoot, Texas 78005
Hogeye, Texas 75423
Cactus, Texas 79013
Notrees, Texas 79759
Best, Texas 76932
Veribest, Texas 76886
Kickapoo, Texas 75763
Dime Box, Texas 77853
Old Dime Box, Texas 77853
Telephone, Texas 75488
Telegraph, Texas 76883
Whiteface, Texas 79379
Twitty, Texas 79079
The Anti-Al Gore City
Kilgore, Texas 75662
And our favorites...
Cut and Shoot, Texas 77303
Gun Barrel City, Texas 75147
Ding Dong, Texas
West, Texas (it's in Central Texas)
and, of course,
Muleshoe, Texas 79347
Here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about folks from Texas
If someone in a Lowe's store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you may live in Texas;
If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you may live in Texas;
If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you may live in Texas;
If 'Vacation' means going anywhere south of Dallas for the weekend, you may live in Texas;
If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Texas;
If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Texas;
If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you may live in Texas;
If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Texas;
If the speed limit on the highway is 55 mph --you're going 80 and everybody's passing you, you may live in Texas;
If you find 60 degrees 'a little chilly,' you may live in Texas;
If you actually understand these jokes, and share them with all your Texas friends, you definitely live in Texas.
Here are some little known, very interesting facts about Texas:
1. Beaumont to El Paso: 742miles
2. Beaumont to Chicago : 770 miles
3. El Paso is closer to California than to Dallas
4. World's first rodeo was in Pecos, July 4, 1883.
5. The Flagship Hotel in Galveston is the only hotel in North America built over water. Destroyed by Hurricane Ike - 2008!
6. The Heisman Trophy was named after John William Heisman who was the first full-time coach at Rice University in Houston.
7. Brazoria County has more species of birds than any other area in North America.
8. Aransas Wildlife Refuge is the winter home of North America 's only remaining flock of whooping cranes.
9. Jalapeno jelly originated in Lake Jackson in 1978.
10. The worst natural disaster in US history was in 1900, caused by a hurricane in which over 8,000 lives were lost on Galveston Island.
11. The first word spoken from the moon, July 20, 1969, was "Houston," but the Space Center was actually in Clear Lake City at the time.
12. King Ranch in South Texas is larger than Rhode Island.
13. Tropical Storm Claudette brought a US rainfall record of 43" in 24 hours in and around Alvin in July of 1979.
14. Texas is the only state to enter the US by TREATY, (known as the Constitution of 1845 by the Republic of Texas to enter the Union) instead of by annexation. This allows the Texas Flag to fly at the same height as the US Flag, and Texas may choose to divide into 5 states.
15. A Live Oak tree near Fulton is estimated to be 1500 years old.
16. Caddo Lake is the only natural lake in the state.
17. Dr Pepper was invented in Waco in 1885. There is no period in Dr Pepper.
18. Texas has had six capital cities: Washington-on-the Brazos, Harrisburg, Galveston, Velasco, West Columbia, and Austin.
19. The Capitol Dome in Austin is the only dome in the US which is taller than the Capitol Building in Washington, DC (by 7 feet).
20. The San Jacinto Monument is the tallest free standing monument in the world and it is taller than the Washington Monument
21. The name 'Texas ' comes from the Hasini Indian word 'tejas' meaning friends. Tejas is not Spanish for Texas.
22. The State Mascot is the Armadillo. An interesting bit of trivia about the armadillo is they always have four babies. They have one egg, which splits into four, and they either have four males or four females.
23. The first domed stadium in the US was the Astrodome in Houston.
Cowboy's Ten Commandments posted on the wall at Cross Trails Church in Farlie, Texas:
(1) Just one God.
(2) Honor yer Ma & Pa.
(3) No telling tales or gossipin'.
(4) Git yourself to Sunday meeting.
(5) Put nothin' before God.
(6) No foolin' around with another fellow's gal.
(7) No killin'.
(
Watch yer mouth.(9) Don't take what ain't yers.
(10) Don't be hankerin' for yer buddy's stuff.
Y'all git all that?
Lord, keep Your arm around my shoulder
and Your hand over my mouth.
38
Spin Zone / Re: Paul Pelosi Attacked
« on: October 28, 2022, 03:48:03 PM »
Word in San Francisco is that Paul refused to do the courtesy reach around.
39
Spin Zone / Re: Biden says his executive order was passed by congress.
« on: October 26, 2022, 06:34:42 AM »When Blake and Trapper left it kind of sucked after that. The first 2 or 3 seasons were great. After that, meh....
Loved Frank Burns though.
Frank Burns eats worms.
41
Spin Zone / Re: Tulsi calls it quits
« on: October 18, 2022, 03:44:33 PM »I’d trade lizzy cheney for a dead spark plug and a used breath mint from Tulsi.
42
Spin Zone / Re: Joke Thread: Post 'em if ya got 'em
« on: October 18, 2022, 12:53:40 PM »
An atheist was seated next to a dusty old cowboy on an airplane and he turned to him and said, “Do you want to talk? Flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.”
The old cowboy, who had just started to read his book, replied to the total stranger, “What would you want to talk about?”
“Oh, I don’t know,” said the atheist. “How about why there is no God, or no Heaven or Hell, or no life after death?” as he smiled smugly.
“Okay,” he said. “Those could be interesting topics but let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same stuff – grass. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, but a horse produces clumps. Why do you suppose that is?”
The atheist, visibly surprised by the old cowboy's intelligence, thinks about it and says, “Hmmm, I have no idea.”
To which the cowboy replies, “Do you really feel qualified to discuss God, Heaven and Hell, or life after death, when you don’t know crap?”
The old cowboy, who had just started to read his book, replied to the total stranger, “What would you want to talk about?”
“Oh, I don’t know,” said the atheist. “How about why there is no God, or no Heaven or Hell, or no life after death?” as he smiled smugly.
“Okay,” he said. “Those could be interesting topics but let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow, and a deer all eat the same stuff – grass. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, but a horse produces clumps. Why do you suppose that is?”
The atheist, visibly surprised by the old cowboy's intelligence, thinks about it and says, “Hmmm, I have no idea.”
To which the cowboy replies, “Do you really feel qualified to discuss God, Heaven and Hell, or life after death, when you don’t know crap?”
43
Spin Zone / Re: Draft dodging
« on: September 30, 2022, 09:13:09 AM »Have that movie on DVD. It's excellent.
I have it also. It is in the rotation of movies I watch once the wife goes to sleep.
44
Spin Zone / Re: Scott Adams continues to poke fun ...
« on: September 22, 2022, 12:57:46 PM »
I assume he has enough money and is writing for the enjoyment of it.
I read Doonesbury. I laughed sometimes and other times thought, 'Wow, that is stupid.'
I never thought about boycotting the newspaper.
Fucktards on the left are ruining another thing.
I read Doonesbury. I laughed sometimes and other times thought, 'Wow, that is stupid.'
I never thought about boycotting the newspaper.
Fucktards on the left are ruining another thing.
