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Messages - texasag93

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31
Spin Zone / Re: Joke Thread: Post 'em if ya got 'em
« on: August 12, 2023, 09:24:09 AM »
You’ll understand
Man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, “Perfect timing. You’re just like Frank.”
Passenger: “Who?”
Cabbie: “Frank Feldman. He’s a guy who did everything right all the time.
Passenger: “There are always a few clouds over everybody.”
Cabbie: “Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand Slam at tennis. 
He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star and you should have heard him play the piano. He was an amazing guy.” Passenger: “Sounds like he was really something special.”
Cabbie: “There’s more. He had a memory like a computer. 
He remembered everybody’s birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order, and which fork to eat them with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Frank Feldman could do everything right every single time.”
Passenger: “Wow, what a guy!”
Cabbie: “He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good.
He would never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too.
He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measure up to Frank Feldman.”
Passenger: “How did you meet him?”
ll
Cabbie: “I never actually met Frank. He died and I married his wife.”

32
Spin Zone / Re: Joke Thread: Post 'em if ya got 'em
« on: July 30, 2023, 06:06:48 PM »
Cell phones...

33
Spin Zone / Re: Roe v. Wade Overturned
« on: July 10, 2023, 11:12:23 AM »
Ok, let me make you guys hate me even more.
I think the government should provide free abortions on demand for anyone with an IQ less than 100.
In fact, I think we should make it mandatory.  Why should we allow stupid people to breed like rabbits,and then support those people when they become Democrats.

It's unconstitutional.

And, nobody hates you. Persecution complex much?  :)

35
Spin Zone / Re: Trump v DeSantis 2024
« on: June 26, 2023, 10:11:55 AM »

36
Spin Zone / Re: Joke Thread: Post 'em if ya got 'em
« on: June 25, 2023, 06:35:34 AM »
A couple travels to the Holy Land with the mother in law.   While on vacation, the mother in law falls ill and passes away. 

 At the funeral director, he tells the couple “You have two options, the first is we prepare your dear mother and have her shipped back to the US for burial.  The cost is $10,000. “

 “Your second option is we can prepare and bury her here, and that would cost $200”

 The husband speaks up and says “ We’ll have her shipped back to the US”

 The funeral director then tells the husband , “but Sir, you could have her buried here in the most beautiful and holy places on earth for far less”.

 The husband thinks, then says “ A couple of thousand years ago, your people buried a man here, and three days later he arose from the dead”……………” There’s no way I can take that chance.”

37
Spin Zone / Re: Joke Thread: Post 'em if ya got 'em
« on: June 18, 2023, 07:15:19 PM »
I fucked up and hit the wrong tab and thought I deleted it. All my fault. I was trying to quote you Joe. Lol.

The paragraph got trans-posed.

38
Spin Zone / Re: scumbag Schiff not censured
« on: June 15, 2023, 02:43:03 PM »
Censure is meaningless.  It’s a slap on the wrist. 

It’s time to bring on the pain. 

Republicans just don’t get it.

39
Spin Zone / Re: Trump v DeSantis 2024
« on: June 14, 2023, 12:40:05 PM »
I'm sick of hearing MAGA will destroy U.S. "democracy".  What a load of shit.

It will destroy their version of democracy, which is better known as communism. 

The communist democrats love changing word meanings to fit a narrative. 

40
Spin Zone / Re: Trump v DeSantis 2024
« on: June 13, 2023, 08:02:25 AM »

41
Spin Zone / Re: RFK Jr
« on: June 12, 2023, 04:47:30 PM »
DALLAS, TX — In a surprise move, the Democratic National Committee has decided to support Presidential candidate Robert F. Kennedy Jr. with a nice rally by a grassy knoll in Dallas.

"It will be a picturesque setting, surrounded by nature and clear, open skies with perfect visibility for aiming down scope, providing the ideal backdrop for this historic occasion!" said DNC spokesperson Clyde Jeffers. "We can't wait to launch his campaign with a bang. We really think he's got a shot!"

https://babylonbee.com/news/dnc-generously-offers-to-host-rally-for-rfk-jr-by-grassy-knoll?utm_source=The+Babylon+Bee+Newsletter&utm_medium=email&fbclid=IwAR2wf47UTt2Irix30PR-Kc9qBIGLBa6VJWsivmt-YQkWAihoiehNXPNnxp4_aem_th_AfnSo-S9ycJI3uGFlpKcrntpaRF8Bb9ggnNOB9oF1SMyo1O1vCa4Y6060XlZLRo7Qm4&mibextid=Zxz2cZ

42
Spin Zone / Re: What is a Woman streams on Twitter at 8:00 ET
« on: June 07, 2023, 06:55:19 AM »
Believe me, a sharp woman will know you are pretending to “understand.” And understanding is not really what she wants. Really listening to her is the important part, and you can’t fake that, either. A woman wants to be genuinely heard and known. If you’re pretending to do those things, especially if you’re doing so to seduce her, she will eventually if not immediately perceive it and if the relationship continues it means she is incorporating your deception into her decision making about the relationship. Pretending anything over time  usually is not healthy.

Yep.  We’ve gotten to the point in our marriage where I come out and say, “Okay, I know it’s the nail in my forehead, alright?  Don’t tell me to pull it out.  Just let me bitch about it.”

An example, the extreme mental and emotional trauma my family is going through taking care of my mother, and my husband wants to say it’s an easy fix, you need to put her in a nursing home.  No, we are not taking out that nail but I need to bitch about it.


43
Spin Zone / Re: another icon bites the dust...
« on: June 01, 2023, 04:41:08 PM »
I thought you were dating a different model of Corvette.

Speaking of Corvettes, Mark just finished painting the body. He is fully restoring a 1980 model.  I’m really proud of him, he’s worked very hard on it.  Well I say finished, but it has to cure now, then I guess he polishes or some other step.  He’s already done the frame, the brakes, the engine, I think the wiring harness is next.

45
Spin Zone / Re: The GOP has kicked me out
« on: May 16, 2023, 11:04:53 AM »
If you want to piss someone off, make a small cash donation in their name, with their address.

If they're a liberal, send the donation to Trump.

If they're conservative, send the donation to Biden.

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